Nowadays, it is much easier for men and women to meet on the Internet than in public places and especially on the street. It’s enough to go to any rating of dating websites, for example, RatingDatings, choose a suitable single ladies dating site, meet single girl online and text her. But, as a rule, after “hello,” the question arises, “What can you ask a person who attracted attention?” Today we will find out what to ask someone before dating them, what questions to ask yourself before dating someone, list some good examples of questions to ask when dating someone new that will help you get to know a person you’ve met online better, intrigue their interest, and cheer them up. But, before we list some questions to ask when newly dating, let’s discuss the influence online dating has on the way people meet each other in the 21st century.

what questions to ask a girl before dating

How the 21st Century Influenced Dating

Online dating and the Internet, in general, have done more for society than just changed the way we interact with the world. They've changed society from the inside out, and this is important to understand if you live in the 21st century. According to researchers, whose field of interest includes the emergence of online relationships, the way we seek love in the modern world unites society in completely new ways.

Science Alert says that not so long ago a relationship began with a smile or a handshake, rather than a “like” or a “wink.” Everything began to change in the mid-1990s, with the advent of sites like Today we have many analogs that exist on the dating market, the main of which, of course, is Tinder. But digital technology has not only simplified romantic dating. The data collected by dating sites allowed researchers to talk about new and very interesting communication habits.

In one study, J. Ortega from Essex University and P. Hergovich from the University of Vienna decided to see how increasing popularity of online dating has influenced the nature of modern society. So they concluded that most people are closely connected with about a hundred of different groups of people, and these people have their own connections and groups of people with whom they communicate.

“These connections serve as bridges between our group of close friends and other groups, which allows us to connect to the global community,” says José Ortega in an interview with MIT Technology Review, “such connections were simply impossible to establish just a few decades ago. Interestingly enough, for heterosexual couples, online dating rose to the second place (the option of "meeting someone through friends" is still the most popular) in the ranking of the most likely ways to find a permanent partner."

“Our model predicts an almost complete racial integration in relationships, which was made possible precisely thanks to online interactions,” says Ortega and Hergovich. And one more thing: marriages made after meeting on the Internet, as the analysis shows, are less likely to end in divorce and are generally more reliable. By the way, the same large-scale study of 2013, published by PNAS, speaks of the same.

Even though it seems to us that the Internet makes us alone, in reality, things are much better. Because interacting with people from different parts of the world, destroying borders, allows us to build new connections (which are more durable than ever). And, frankly, it's nice to see evidence that the time spent online was not wasted. Let’s now talk about online dating questions to ask before meeting.

Main Questions to Ask Before the Meeting

By asking different questions to a person during communication, you can get to know them better. Statistics on the topics of messages on dating sites shows that in most cases, after meeting on a site, people continue to communicate in 26.1% of cases. Of course, often it all ends with a greeting or an emoji. Therefore, for your communication to be interesting and informative for both of you, you should adhere to the following rules before deciding to start a dialogue with a person.

When asking smart questions, do not scare off the interlocutor, asking a girl about what discoveries in physics she was most struck by, how many gold medals did your team take in the Olympics? Does she know the theory of relativity? Questions should be simple and easy to understand, otherwise, a person will simply not answer you.

what questions to ask when dating onlineYou should not ask too many questions, otherwise, it will look more like an interrogation or a job interview, but this is not the case. It is better, after receiving the answer to the asked question, to try to develop the topic, state your point of view, and learn the opinion of the interlocutor.

It would be better if the first question implies a long-winded answer which can be then followed up with a few small ones, for you to clarify the things you didn’t understand.

It is important to ask interesting questions. Your partner will answer them more readily and already based on the answers received, further communication can be developed. Such questions may be about some significant events in the world, well-known film premieres. Possible weekend plans. Questions about their hobbies, interests.

In correspondence, the main thing is to carefully read the responses received from the interlocutor. This can help you form an opinion about a person, their interests, character, main occupations and will allow you to make a decision on further communication with them, to end it at the stage of correspondence or go on and meet in real life.

Here are some questions to ask someone before dating them to find out something about your partner.

  • Tell me, what did you like when you were little?
  • What was your relationship with your first friend?
  • Was there love in the kindergarten?
  • What are your favorite pets?
  • Tell me, what do you like in general? Hunting, fishing, cars?
  • What type of vacation do you think is the best?
  • What actions annoy you the most?
  • What events from the summer camp did you remember the best?
  • Which movie genre do you like the most?
  • Do you like videogames?
  • Which dishes do you prefer?

Here are some questions to ask a girl before dating that have to do with love and relationships.

  • Would you move with me to another city?
  • What would you like to ask me if we were alone?
  • What are the disadvantages of love at first sight?
  • What makes you different from other girls?
  • What are your forbidden topics in communication with the opposite sex?
  • Do you think of me as your only one?
  • Do I have a better physique and appearance than your ex?
  • How rich is your sex experience? What do you like about it?
  • What do you value in love and romantic relationships?
  • Will our relationship lead to something more serious?

What questions to ask when dating online? There are different types of questions to ask before you start dating, depending on your goal and interest. Here are 5 questions to ask before dating if you want to make a person happy.

  • What is the worst movie you’ve ever seen?
  • What was the weirdest thing that your ex did?
  • What topic of conversation is forbidden for you?
  • What are the things that you like about me?
  • What questions would you like to ask me?

What Questions Should You Avoid?

There are some important questions to ask before dating someone, but there are also some questions you should avoid. It is better not to ask certain questions when communicating with a person, as they will offend the interlocutor or put them in an uncomfortable position. Thus, here are some questions you should avoid.

1. No need to ask about any problems in appearance or clothing (Why not enlarge your lips/breasts? Why do you have pimples on your face? Why can’t you cover them with makeup? These clothes don’t fit you at all, they make you fat, why do you put them on? Why don’t you dye your hair in red/white/black? Why won’t you lose some weight?).

2. About marriage or future children (How does such a beautiful man/woman doesn’t have a partner yet? Why are you single? How many children do you want? When are you planning to get married and have a family?). Similar questions can really hurt a person. There are enough friends and parents who are interested in these issues.

questions to ask when newly dating3. It is better not to try to find out the number of sexual partners of a person. Even if you get the answer to the question asked, the answer will be false in 94%. If you do not want to be deceived, you do not need to ask. It is better to ask questions about the state of health of the interlocutor, after telling about your visit to the doctor and your impressions (whether they are positive or negative), then a person will tell you in return about their experience with doctors, and you can ask about the frequency of visits and what is their attitude to visits to doctors in general?

4. Forget about questions about excess weight. Questions about age are also not entirely appropriate.

5. It will be a mistake to ask questions about their income and total spending on shopping and entertainment per month. Questions about financial situations fall into the same category, and you don’t need to ask them if you don’t want to spoil your communication (How much do you earn? Do you have your own apartment, or do you live with your parents? How many rooms do you have? Do you have a car? (Year, model, car interior and other specifications)

6. There is no need to be interested in the friends of a person you’re communicating with and their appearance. You are talking to this particular person.

7. What they plan in the future is a personal matter. Not everyone is thinking about it, so don’t make them think over their plans for the future, they may not have any.

8. You can ask some questions about their past relationships, but don’t try to find out everything about them. For how long they went on, the reason for the breakup, etc. Such questions will remain unanswered, and your interlocutor will feel awkward.

9. Question about choosing a place for a date. Well, where will we go? It would be more appropriate if you offer your version and find out what your partner wants to do, perhaps they were there, and they did not like it at all.

Now that you know a few things about what questions to ask a girl before dating, let’s talk about safety.

Do I Need to Worry About My Safety?

If you are planning a date, there is no doubt that the main thing for you is to make a good impression and have a nice time. However, the most important thing is safety. The first or tenth date - it does not matter, most importantly caution. Therefore, before spending a lot of time in front of the mirror, check your upcoming date on all counts.

1. Invite a friend

If you are going on a date with someone you have never seen in real life, I advise you not to be alone with them. Invite your friends or have a double date.

2. Meet in a public place

If you want to take care of your safety, then you should consider this point. The place of your meeting should be crowded: a cafe, restaurant, cinema, or etc. Most importantly, there should be people around.

3. Tell your friends that you are going on a date

This is one of the best ways to protect yourself. Tell everything, where, when, and with whom you are going on a date with. Ask to call you if you suddenly do not return home as planned.

4. Do not meet at home

Meet away from home, do not let them pick you up in a car if you are not familiar with them. Do not immediately open up about the place where you work or live. You should always have the return routes in the form of public transport or taxi.

5. Do not tell everything

Naturally, you will tell something about yourself. Just like your partner. After all, you are interesting to each other. However, control the things you say. Chat freely about hobbies, interests, likes, dislikes. But hold on to specific information about work and home.

6. Be rational and sober

The most important way to protect yourself is to not use anything that can make you intoxicated. Alcohol and drugs can harm you. You can get some drinks; however, you should know the limits and be aware of how much you need to get a bit drunk.

what to ask someone before dating them7. End the date where you started it

Best of all, say goodbye to each other in the same place where you met. Do not let yourself be transported, so you will give out your home address. Control the situation, be careful.

8. Consider an escape plan

Make a backup plan with your friends so that they can save you from the most terrible date in the world. Let them “urgently” call you or come up with some urgent reason to leave the date.

How to ask questions and not be intrusive

The rating of the most stupid and repulsive questions clearly includes questions about ex-partners in the style of “how many men/women did you have,” “why did you break up?” “I'm better than your ex.” Their ex is in the past, and it is worth forgetting about it. By such clarifications, a person shows their uncertainty and anxieties.

Too personal and intimate questions are acceptable, but only with close contact, when a certain milestone has already been passed, and the person of interest is in love or close to this. If you ask about their favorite Kama Sutra pose already on the second date, tell vulgar jokes, and, in general, focus on sex during your first dates, there is a high probability that there will not be the third meeting at all.

Tactless questions that have to do with flaws in appearance, about marriage, and children, weight, number of sexual partners, and appearance of ex-partners should be avoided. All this will eventually come up in communication in itself, do not rush it. Refuse questions that you are not ready to answer yourself. So you will get rid of awkwardness when they give you a complete answer and asks what you think on this subject.

Refrain from direct questions that force them to demonstrate knowledge in any discipline (Are you fond of chemistry? Then tell me which element is on the 75th place in the periodic table. Do you know German? Say something in German). Be very careful when it comes to the conversation about ex-partners.

Avoid questions about money, wealth, and property. Don’t ask anything related to these topics during your first few weeks of communication. If you can’t restrain yourself, ask indirect questions like (Could you live a year without working? Would you give your mom a car/new kitchen/trip abroad for her anniversary?) Curiosity and direct questions about the material condition will show a person that they are talking to a tactless gold-digger.

There are many pitfalls in discussions about politics, religion, social activity. An incorrectly asked question can offend and destroy the established relationships.

Now that we have listed some godly questions to ask before dating, what not to ask, and how to keep yourself safe on your first date, let’s finish this article off with an important tip. The main rule is this - questions should be sincere, reflect a real, lively interest in the character of the interlocutor. If you act too focused on the looks or wealth of a person – they will think that you are just using them, and you are not really interested.

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