Dangers and Signs of a One-Sided Relationship

Searching for a romance can easily turn into paranoia. You spend hours, days, weeks trying to find a partner on those online dating services offering you to meet a girl now. Thus, when you finally find your partner, you think that everything is going to be fine. And at first, it seems that everything is fine. But then you start noticing something. At first, you try to ignore the red flags, but in the end, you can no longer turn a blind eye to it. You feel like your partner is not doing enough for your relationship.

As time passes, you start noticing that usually, you meet when it is comfortable for your partner. While you try to do your best to have free time for a date, they will never change their schedule to meet with you. They often hang out with their friends instead of hanging out with you. In the end, it simply feels like you aren't their first priority, and you are unlikely reaching your partner's list of priorities. And you find yourself in a one-sided relationship.

One-Sided Relationship Meaning

Okay, you can find excuses like your honeymoon phase is over, and your partner comes back to the routine of their lives. But what if you didn't have a honeymoon phase? If your romance starts with you having more interest in it than your partner, probably you caught up in a one-sided bond. But if that doesn't ring the bell, we are here to provide you with quite a one-sided definition.

So, what is a one-sided relationship? Generally, one-sided relationships are a type of bond in which one partner puts much more time and effort into a relationship than another. And you can actually finish here, as it is obvious that you are in a one-sided relationship.

Think about whether your partner has reasons to be busy? Maybe your partner is seeing you rarely because they want to spend quality time with you? Let's be honest, no one is going to be satisfied when your date is spoiled by that feeling that it's going to end soon, as one of you has a lot of work to do. Does that sound familiar? Have you tried excusing your partner like that? Well, maybe things are just the way they are or maybe you are experiencing one of those instances of one-sided open relationships.

Yep, even an open relationship can be one-sided. But people often experience one-sided relationships with family, friends, spouses or business partners. And that's getting quite confusing, and you are feeling like you are going to have serious trust issues after reading this article. But we are not here to confuse you, but to help you sort things out, so continue reading.

Are One-Sided Relationships and One-Sided Love Similar?

While we've provided you with the meaning of a one-sided relationship in a nutshell, applying that vague definition without taking into account all the details will be absolutely wrong. Doing it, you can easily kill off the romance that can be revitalized, as the one-sided relationship doesn't always mean one-sided love. Your one-sided relationship can be just a result of a difficult period in your partner's life, and it doesn't mean that your partner doesn't love you. Things are quite different when it comes to one-sided love.

What is one-sided love, you may ask? Well, in a nutshell, it's pain, torture, heartbreak, but not love. You are constantly waiting for something that will never happen. When you are experiencing one-sided love, you are daydreaming about a person whose mind you never cross. Like at all. You are expecting them to call you, but they never do. You are spending days and nights in the hope that you will receive a message from them, but you never will. As they don't love you.

So, basically, it is a typical case of unrequited love, which may have nothing to do with your one-sided romantic bond sufferings. The point is that a one-sided relationship is a relationship after all, while in the case of unrequited love, the bond may exist only in your head. You could have sex once, but that's it. So, there is no point in thinking that the lack of attention from your partner always signifies that they don't love you.

Although, both of those one-sided cases have one thing in common – it's a constant battle, but those battles are different. In case of unrequited love, you are constantly battling your common-sense finding more and more ridiculous signs that the object of your desire cares for you, while in reality, you stay unnoticed for him or her. And in case of one-sided relationship, you are constantly battling the quite logical idea to bring up the things you don't like about the state of your romance, as you are afraid that you will lose your partner, while that's the most obvious thing you should do, but we will get back to that later.

Main Signs of a One-Sided Relationship

So, let's figure out whether you are actually in a one-sided relationship or it's just a period when your partner cannot devote as much attention to you as you want. To do that, we offer you to check the main signs of a one-sided relationship without any further ado.

Absence of initiative from your partner

Do you get the feeling that you initiate most of your communication? Not that your partner ignores you completely, but it is always you who phones and texts first. They would reply to your messages, you may even have normal chatting, but they won't text you first. Another thing, your conversations often end abruptly because they stop replying.

Only you sacrifice something for the relationship

You are the only one who tries to change your schedule to have a date with your partner. Your partner most likely won't find free ten minutes to meet up with you for coffee, while you are always ready to rearrange your plans when your partner is eager to see you.

Your partner would prefer spending time with someone else

While your partner finds it extremely difficult to meet with you, they often spend time with their friends. And that isn't something that you find out by checking their account on social media. They casually bomb you with this information. And when you are trying to discuss it… check the next point.

Your partner avoids discussing relationship problems

Whenever you are trying to discuss things about your relationship, you don't feel that happy about, your partner either avoids discussing it or starts explaining to you that they don't see a problem in it. And that's just it. They don't see a problem with it, and if you do – that's your problem. Don't expect any promises that they would try to be better for you.

Constant fear of relationship falling apart

Needless to say that all those previous points end up into you living in the constant fear that your relationship will fall apart. You don't discuss your problems; it often feels like your partner doesn't care for your plans and your feelings. It won't even be surprising if they leave you for someone else without telling you.

Absence of happiness

While at first, this situation may give you some small rewards, as you feel like the great protector of your relationship. But the fact that you are the only one your bond is holding on doesn't get enough recognition. Actually, your efforts don't get any recognition at all. And it all ends up in you no longer feeling happy about your relationship.

One-Sided Relationships: Advice and Treatment

Probably after the previous passages, you are browsing through "You shouldn't fight for someone to whom you mean nothing" and other quotes about one-sided relationships. But are all those signs mean that your relationship is bound to end? While it is up to you to decide, but you need to think about what causes one-sided relationships. What if your partner got hurt in a previous romance, and fears to get to close with the new partner? What, your partner no longer looks like a jerk to you? In this case, you might be interested in the way you can change your relationship. In this case, we offer you to check out our one-sided relationships advice without any further ado.

Acknowledge the problem

You need to stop finding excuses for your partner's actions and admit that you are having a problem. This is the first and the hardest step, as it is quite easy to live in your fantasy world where you and your partner actually don't have any problems. But if you want to solve the issue, you need to admit that the problem does actually exist. Acknowledging the problem allows you to work with it further.

Make a journal to monitor your relationship

The next step is to start a journal of your relationship. There you need to write down the positive and negative aspects of your partner. You should also write down all the instances when you felt neglected and the reasons for that. Write down all the manifestations of the one-sided relationship, the reasons your partner provided you with and whether you believe in them. This will help you figure out whether your partner’s neglectful attitude is real, or you are just imagining things.

Ask yourself what you really want from your romance

Two previous points will lead you to asking yourself what you really want from your romance. Ask yourself what your ideal relationship looks like. That will help you figure out what needs to be changed in your current relationship and whether it is possible. If you think that those changes are possible, you can move to the next step.

Clearly express to your partner what you don't like about your relationship

You need to express to your partner clearly all the things you don't like about their actions. Your journal will help you in this case, as you will have all the examples of your partner's neglectful attitude towards you. This step is quite hard, as you need to be ready to move on if your partner says that they won't change anything.

Talk your relationship over with your partner

If your partner expresses their eagerness to save your relationship and is willing to make the required changes, you should talk it over. You need to discuss what you should change in your relationship and what both of you are ready to change. You need to be prepared that certain aspects won't change at all, thus you need to emphasize the main problems.

Change the behavior

You both might need to change your behaviors completely. While you may be expecting that it is only your partner who has to change their habits, but there is a possibility that there are certain things about you that your partner doesn't like. If you want your partner to change, you must be ready to change yourself as well.

Start focusing on yourself

The first change you need to make is to start focusing on yourself. The one-sided relationship often exhausts people, as you were focused on your romance only. Now, you need to take a deep breath and start focusing on yourself. Changes may take a certain time, and if you keep on being focused on your relationship, you will simply torture your partner by your constant monitoring of their progress. Avoid that, as it may ruin your relationship completely.

Stop Being Afraid!

As you can see, while it takes a lot of work, fixing your one-sided issue is not that difficult. But you need to ask yourself, how the hell did you manage to get yourself into a one-sided relationship? While nobody tries to justify your partner here, you've allowed that as well. You were afraid to talk about it when the problems started, and you were finding excuses for your partner. Why? Because you are afraid of being abandoned. Stop it right now! We all deserve to be loved, and you need to remember it. Stop making your dating life an issue. Stop getting paranoid that your partner hasn't replied to your message immediately (most likely that was the reason why you are here), as in the morning you will receive a message like, "Sorry that I haven't replied, I fell asleep all of a sudden." Remember that you need to respect and love yourself first, then you will get love and respect from your partner.